Zack and I decided early on that when Marina could
walk and communicate, she should also be potty
trained. We couldn’t see ourselves changing the diaper
of a two year old after being instructed by her to do
so. Hence, our potty journey began.

I had talked with my mom about how she potty trained
my brother and I. She told me she would hold us over
the toilet when she thought we had to go and by the
time we were about a year old, we would take ourselves
to the bathroom. Simple as that.

When Marina was a few
weeks old, Mimi sent me a New York Times Article about
infant potty training. I think she sent it as a joke!
The article suggested that the reader check out the
website www.diaperfreebaby.org for more information.
After exploring the website I found a local group that
I joined. I lurked on the list for many weeks, not
quite sure how, when, or if we would ever start.

I decided that we needed a potty chair. Everyone on
the list seemed to prefer the Baby Bjorn Little Potty
(aka BBLP) so that’s what I got. That sat around
unused for several weeks. I also decided to purchase a
potty turtleneck that some people on the list talked
about. A potty turtleneck is a nifty little accessory (like a toilet seat cozy) that takes the chill out of the BBLP. The turtleneck
was made by some nice ladies at The EC Store. “EC”
stands for elimination communication - another name
for infant potty training.

I spent many weeks thinking about how in the world we
were going to get Marina to pee or poo on her potty.
It seemed impossible. I asked my mom again how she did
it and what I should do to start. She told me to put
Marina on the potty every time I changed her diaper
and just see what happens. She also said that I
wouldn’t make a catch every time but it was a good
start. My immediate reply was, “If I’m changing her
diaper, she obviously doesn’t have to go to the
bathroom because she just went!” My mom told me to
just do it. So I left it at that.

A few more weeks went by. I read this book called
Diaper Free by Ingrid Bauer. It was interesting but it
still didn’t make sense to me. I wanted to have it all
figured out before i tried it.

The next thing I did was to move the BBLP into
Marina’s room. I thought maybe if it was near the area
where we change her, i might put her on it. It sat in
her room for a couple of weeks.

Finally, on the night of December 30, I had a
revelation. I was going to do it! The time had come. I
was changing Marina’s diaper. Before I put on the new
one, I set her on the BBLP and made the cueing sound,
“Psss, psss, psss.” Viola! She immediately pooped! I
was thrilled! I felt so proud of her and myself!

Little did we know, but our life was about to
become even more focused on poo and pee. We continued
on, putting Marina on her potty after naps and
whenever we thought she might have to go. At first we
didn’t catch much, so I began keeping track of the
intervals at which Marina peed and pooped. I also
looked for signals she would give when she had to go, such as certain fussy noises.

After many misses, I came up with a pretty good
system. Now, on most days we catch 75-80% of the pees
and 100% of the poops.

Zack and I are very happy that we are potty training
Marina. We wouldn’t have it any other way. It seems so much more hygenic to take a baby to the bathroom when it’s time to pee or poo.

Babies don’t just fuss or cry for no reason - they’re trying to tell you something!

Paneer is a staple of Indian vegetarian dishes. It is made by boiling milk with diluted lemon juice, then separating the curd. The curd is placed in a cheesecloth and run under water, then pressed under a heavy weight to press out the water. You can buy it in an Indian market in slabs resembling Tofu. Paneer tastes a bit like fresh mozarella cheese, albeit less fatty and more mild.

Oftentimes, Arti’s mom will make a really tasty dish with Paneer, red bell peppers, and onions in a very rich and spicy cream sauce. We asked her about how she prepares it today, and came up with this recipe doing some experimentation in the kitchen.

We had it for dinner this evening, and it’s the real deal! It really tastes like good Indian food, which is way more that we can say for our attempts at making Thai curry at home.

Many of these ingredients will be difficult to find at a “regular” supermarket, so you will be better off finding an Indian grocery store nearby.

Ingredients
(Makes 4-6 servings)

• 1+ lbs of Paneer, cut into small chunks (1cm x 1cm x 2cm). We used a brand called “Desi”.
• A red bell pepper, sliced, with peices about two inches long
• Half a white or yellow onion, cut similarly to the bell pepper
• 4 Teaspoons Olive oil
• 1 Teaspoon of Jeera (Cumin Seeds)
• 1 ½ Teaspoon of Amchur Powder (Sour Mango Powder)
• 1 ½ Teaspoons of Coriander Powder
• ½ Teaspoon of Turmeric
• 2 ½ Teaspoons of Tandoori BBQ Masala
• ¾ Teaspoon Salt
• ¾ Cup Sour Cream
• ¼ Cup Roasted Cashew Powder. We roasted raw cashews in the toaster oven then blended them in the food processor for a couple of minutes. Add a bit more for a heartier sauce.
• ½ Cup Water

Making the Dish

1. Combine the dry spices (Jeera, Amchur, Coriander, Turmeric, Tandoori Masala, Salt) in a small bowl and set aside.
2. Heat 2 teaspoons of the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat.
3. Add the bell pepper and onion to the skillet, sprinkle with a pinch of salt, and sautee until the bell pepper just starts to get soft, about 4 minutes.
4. Dump the veggies into a bowl and set aside.
5. Add 2 more teaspoons of olive oil to the skillet.
6. Dump in the dry spices from the first step and stir them into the oil for a couple of minutes to really bring out the flavor.
7. Stir in sour cream, cashew powder, and water. Now you have the basis for the sauce! Give it a taste, and adjust any of the spices to your liking.
8. Add the veggies and diced paneer to the sauce, and simmer over low heat for 10-15 minutes (or more) to let the sauce’s flavor permeate the paneer.

This is great served over rice, with Naan, or with Roti (a flat, whole wheat bread). Put some Raita (yogurt with salt, pepper, and shredded cucumber) on the side, and you have a delicious meal.

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything here. I’ve mostly been consumed with day-to-day stuff: Marina, Arti, work, projects. I thought it would be good to write down what Marina has been up to in the past month or so.

As the video shows, Marina is now really really good at rolling herself onto her belly. She did it for the first time maybe three weeks ago, but only did it once. Then days passed, and she did it twice. There was a 1+ week lull of any rolling activity, then she seemed to just get it. Now when she wants to be on her stomach, she is!

This made me realize that kids (and adults?) develop all skills in much the same way. First, there is the element of “beginner’s luck”, where the skill is stumbled upon. In the case of rolling over, I think Marina was kicking her legs around, and everything just fell into place. When the luck fades, then frustration sets in. The person thinks “well, I thought I could do this!”. At this point, it’s all Practice Makes Perfect. Repitition and practice is key to building the muscle memory around the skill. After that comes mastery.

Marina is just grabbing at everything right now. She used to struggle with her arms to grab and hold on to something waved in front of her. Now she just can’t get enough holding and examining. The exersaucer that James and Teresa gave us has really helped hone her eye-arm-hand coordination, since she can spend long amounts of time playing with things around her.

When she’s fussy at dinnertime, I’ll sometimes put her on my lap while I eat. Last week, she started grabbing at my food! She has also started watching Arti and I very intently while we are eating — I think something is clicking in her mind about what we are doing. I’m not sure if she knows that we’re eating, but she’s interested nonetheless.

Arti has been doing a great job with her “EC” (Elimination Communication — a fancy word for “Potty Training”). Lots of people think we’re nuts for putting a 4 month old on the toilet, but we’ve been rewarded with almost zero poopy diapers for nearly a month now. Hopefully once she is more skillful at communicating, she will no longer need diapers. This is a common thing outside of the US — notably in China and India, babies older than 1 year usually are done with diapers. We hope we can get there too!

So that’s about it for baby tricks. Check out pictures and video of our little one!